The world I live in is a room full of rounded corners, windows too far out of reach, and an oxymoronish atmosphere that twists my feeble mind…and my sense of humor. At some point, I made a conscious decision to ignore reality and pretend to live in a world made up of whatever I wanted. Thrill. Love. Forever summer days, and of course, happy endings.
But when I set my pen down, or close my laptop, I’m back in the real world again, breathing in the same oxymoronish air that makes me laugh when I’m expected to cry, or fight when I’m expected to fly.
Even aside from all my quirks and lapses from reality, my lot in life itself is considered unusual by most of those around me, since I’m still single. Makes things kind of awkward sometimes. I’ll admit, I’m headed for that crazy old cat lady phase, but hey, there are some very positive aspects to not having yet wed. Besides, if it weren’t for single people, nobody would ever get married.
I’ve had over thirty years of experience being single, and I’ve compiled quite a mental list of positive aspects. These are my favorite pros:
1) Time itself is yours and yours alone.
2) Bad morning breath and messy hair don’t really matter.
3) If you spend hours on the phone or computer, you’re neglecting no one.
4) That never-ending battle with the toilet seat being left up or down? It doesn’t exist.
5) Nobody sees how much chocolate you have for dessert.
6) Your toothpaste tube can be squished anywhere you want.
7) The bed’s entire surface is all yours to sprawl on (unless you have cats, then you’re left with a mere 20%).
8) The color of paint for the living room must please only you.
9) When you wonder if a piece of clothing makes you look fat, there’s no one to tell you yes.
10) No one else has to like what you fix for supper.
11) Quiet time is available ANY time.
12) There are no arguments about what to watch on tv or which movie to rent.
13) If you fall asleep on the couch, it’s not because you’re in trouble.
14) And my ultimate favorite: When you buy a tub of ice cream…it’s ALL yours!
Of course, even in my not-so-average world, there are cons to being single, as well. I can’t deny that. So I came up with a list of those, too.
Actually, instead of wasting space, just read back through the above list again, and that will suffice.
If you’re married, I’m sorry. And I envy you. And if you’re single, I hope you enjoy it and hate it as much as I do. I’m not the only one in a world of round corners and windows out of reach. But sometimes I imagine the panes lowering just a little, giving me slight glimpses of a different world on the other side. I think there’s sunshine there, too. And I hope there are happy endings. But if not, I’ll make up my own just like I always do.
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