Maybe I'm just overly sensitive when it comes to this topic. Or maybe it's something that really should be explored. Either way, this particular issue has popped up countless times over the past week alone.
We never really know. Ever. Even when we know someone better than we know ourselves, there are still elusive facts that can affect a person's moods and/or reactions. Yet we like to think we know exactly why so-and-so does such-and-such. And we like to talk about it.
I think of things like a little girl who's too shy to try an activity at school. She gets teased or maybe even bullied for it. But no one knows her hesitance is born of abuse at home. I think of things like a man who can't seem to get motivated enough to move on in his life. People look down on him for making little progress. But no one realizes he was put down all his childhood years, and he simply can't muster the courage to try just to fail again. I think of a family who wears less than trendy clothes - sometimes they're not even the cleanest clothes. Other people can't understand why those parents would let their kids out in public like that. But what no one knows is that the father has been out of work for the last six months, and the mom has been cleaning houses just so they have enough money to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day.
As a society - as humans - we are so very quick to not simply judge one another, but to also attain such an arrogance that we think we know exactly why someone else acts the way they do. And when we think we've figured it out, we're just as quick to act on it, whether we talk about that person behind their back, avoid them altogether or believe they need our advice.
We get upset at the snippy checkout girl without realizing her father just found out he has cancer. We roll our eyes at the rude waiter at the restaurant and withhold a tip without knowing his wife just texted and said she was leaving him. We're quick to become angry at the not-so-helpful rep on the phone without knowing her entire morning has been a disaster from getting the kids to school late, to burnt toast and a sick dog.
I'm not saying there is a legit reason for every offhanded comment, temper flare or downright rude behavior. Sometimes there is no excuse. Actually, there's never really an excuse. But sometimes there are reasons we cannot see. And when we judge too quickly and act on our own irritation, we become just as guilty.
Most of the time, we'll never know what has motivated those negative actions or words. We may never see that same checkout girl again, and next time we call to have our cell phone fixed, it will be a different rep. But that doesn't mean we should stop caring. It doesn't mean we should allow ourselves the luxury of getting upset just because if we never have to see that person again, our arrogant assumptions tend to be guilt-free. We still have to answer for our own reactions and words, regardless of whether or not we think we were treated poorly, or someone deserved our harsh response or even gossip.
Our job is always to act Christ-like, no matter if we feel we've been dealt with rudely or not. Whether we've been snipped at, cursed, or passed by an angry driver. Usually, there's no reward in this, other than the satisfaction of knowing that our calm response (or no response at all) has put out a fire, rather than making it worse. And far fewer ulcers are formed as well.
We never really know.
No comments:
Post a Comment