6/1/11

God's Pace

Over this past holiday weekend, I had three days to stay at home and not think about work. I had free time, I had nap time, I had time to spend outdoors in the gorgeous sunshine. And when Tuesday rolled around and I rolled out of bed, I found that I had not worked on any of my writing projects.

Without fail, this kind of "discovery" always brings with it a bit of guilt and disappointment. Where was my inspiration? Where was my enthusiasm? Motivation? Enjoyment? I live and breathe writing. Why couldn't I take that blessed free time and actually get some good writing done?

After I quit chiding myself, I realized that even though writing is a huge part of who I am, a vacation is sometimes required even from that. Some people may be blessed with the kind of brains that they can write and write and write every waking moment. Me? Not so much. When I'm inspired, I can write on and on and on, but when I'm not, I often come to a complete stop - or almost.

Once my guilt is out of the way, I'm able to think a little more clearly on the timing itself. What am I writing for? For whom am I writing? And for whose time frame? All pleasure aside, my goal is to write for God, since He's the one who gave me the talent and passion in the first place. So He is the "what" and "who." That in itself answers the third question, because if I'm writing for Him, then it's obviously His time frame, not mine.

I'm an impatient person, I'll admit. So when I have weekends like this past one, where I feel I have accomplished so little, I have to sit back and remember why I'm writing. God has a completely different time frame than I do. I can't even imagine what time must look to the Creator of the universe. That said, when He wants me to write, I have confidence that He will provide the inspiration to get it done. He won't sit there and let me feel guilty for falling behind or taking too long - He will prompt me and inspire me so that I can continue His work. Even the short stories, poems and fictional pieces that no one will ever see are counted because they, in themselves, provide inspiration or creativity for the bigger projects. God knows that. He knows what inspires me. And He also knows when I need a break.

I may not like taking breaks, and I may think I need to write every waking hour - but God knows better than I do. And when I go at His pace, the pieces fall together much more nicely.

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